The most ineffective workers are systematically moved to the place where they can do the least damage: management. ~ Scott Adams (Dilbert)
Don’t worry about people stealing your ideas. If your ideas are any good, you’ll have to ram them down people’s throats. ~ Howard Aiken
The first thing a new employee should do on the job is learn to recognize his boss’ voice on the phone. ~ Martin Buxbaum
Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake. ~ Napoleon Bonaparte
A successful man is one who can lay a firm foundation with the bricks others have thrown at him. ~ David Brinkley
First rule of leadership: everything is your fault. ~ A Bug’s Life
Don’t stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed. ~ George Burns
A leader must have the courage to act against an expert’s advice. ~ James CallaghanA leader must have the courage to act against an expert's advice. ~ James Callaghan Click To Tweet
Success is going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm. ~ Winston Churchill
Early to bed and early to rise probably indicates unskilled labor. ~ John Ciardi
Get the right people on the bus and in the right seat. ~ Jim Collins
You do not lead by hitting people over the head – that’s assault, not leadership ~ Dwight Eisenhower
A budget tells us what we can’t afford, but it doesn’t keep us from buying it. ~ William Feather
By working faithfully eight hours a day you may eventually get to be boss and work twelve hours a day. ~ Robert Frost
I don’t want yes-men around me. I want everyone to tell the truth, even if it costs them their jobs. ~ Samuel Goldwyn
Few great men would have got past personnel. ~ Paul Goodman
Life is like a dogsled team. If you ain’t the lead dog, the scenery never changes. ~ Lewis Grizzard
Delegating work works, provided the one delegating works, too. ~ Robert Half
A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don’t need it. ~ Bob Hope
There’s no secret about success. Did you ever know a successful man who didn’t tell you about it? ~ Kin Hubbard
Why join a navy if you can be a pirate? ~ Steve Jobs
A leader is best when people barely know he exists, not so good when people obey and acclaim him, worse when they despise him. But of a good leader who talks little when his work is done, his aim fulfilled, they will say: We did it ourselves. ~ Lao-Tzu
Accomplishing the impossible means only the boss will add it to your regular duties. ~ Doug Larson
Only one man in a thousand is a leader of men – the other 999 follow women. ~ Groucho Marx
Catch a man a fish, and you can sell it to him. Teach a man to fish, and you ruin a wonderful business opportunity. ~ Karl Marx
Work expands so as to fill the time available for its completion. ~ Parkinson’s LawWork expands so as to fill the time available for its completion. ~ Parkinson's Law Click To Tweet
Every employee rises to the level of his own incompetence. ~ The Peter Principle
Every time you feel yourself being pulled into other people’s drama, repeat these words: Not my circus, not my monkeys. ~ Polish Proverb
Always drink upstream from the herd. ~ Will Rogers
It is a terrible thing to look over your shoulder when you are trying to lead – and find no one there. ~ Franklin D. Roosevelt
The best executive is the one who has sense enough to pick good men to do what he wants done, and self-restraint to keep from meddling with them while they do it. ~ Theodore Roosevelt
There’s no reason to be the richest man in the cemetery. You can’t do any business from there. ~ Colonel Sanders
The only place success comes before work is in the dictionary. ~ Vidal SassoonThe only place success comes before work is in the dictionary. ~ Vidal Sassoon Click To Tweet
Never try to teach a pig to sing. It wastes your time and it annoys the pig. ~ George Bernard Shaw
I learned long ago, never to wrestle with a pig, you get dirty; and besides, the pig likes it. ~ George Bernard Shaw
The successful man is the one who finds out what is the matter with his business before his competitors do. ~ Roy L. Smith
The key to being a good manager is keeping the people who hate you away from those who are still undecided. ~ Casey Stengel
Being powerful is like being a lady. If you have to tell people you are, you aren’t. ~ Margaret Thatcher
The problem with the rat race is that even if you win, you’re still a rat. ~ Lilly Tomlin
Success means only doing what you do well, letting someone else do the rest. ~ Goldstein S. TruismSuccess means only doing what you do well, letting someone else do the rest. ~ G. S. Truism Click To Tweet
Always forgive your enemies. Nothing annoys them more. ~ Oscar Wilde
The best way to appreciate your job is to imagine yourself without one. ~ Oscar Wilde
Success is simply a matter of luck. Ask any failure. ~ Earl Wilson
Success in almost any field depends more on energy and drive than it does on intelligence. This explains why we have so many stupid leaders. ~ Sloan Wilson
Nothing recedes like success. ~ Walter Winchell
Eagles soar, but weasels don’t get sucked into jet engines. ~ Steven Wright
Nothing is illegal if a hundred businessmen decide to do it. ~ Andrew Young
A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered desk drawer.
A company is known by the people it keeps.A company is known by the people it keeps. Click To Tweet
A meeting is an event at which the minutes are kept and the hours are lost.
A picture is worth 1,000 words, but it uses up 3,000 times the memory.
At some time in the lifecycle of every organization, its ability to succeed in spite of itself runs out.
Don’t beat a dead horse.
Do not underestimate your abilities. That is your boss’s job.Do not underestimate your abilities. That is your boss's job. Click To Tweet
Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.
He has hit rock bottom and started to dig.
If it’s stupid but works, it isn’t stupid.If it's stupid but works, it isn't stupid. Click To Tweet
If not controlled, work will flow to the competent man until he submerges.
I think, therefore I am overqualified.
Make it idiot-proof and someone will make a better idiot.
Never put off until tomorrow what you can avoid altogether.
Nothing makes me more productive than the last minute.
The first myth of management is that it exists.
The trouble with doing something right the first time is that nobody appreciates how difficult it was.
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